Signs You're Going Through the Dark Night of the Soul

What do you do when you hit an emotional and spiritual low point in ministry, and you’re considering just giving up?

This may be a familiar feeling to some of you pastors and ministry leaders who have been in the ministry trenches for many years now. There are several reasons why pastors may have reached this point.

1. It may be that attendance has stalled or declined in your church over the years (Lord knows covid hit every church very hard), and perhaps that has put financial strain on your ministry.

2. It may be that the church you’re pastoring is forcing you out due to some unresolvable issue within the congregation.

3. It may be a result of your own personal problems you’re struggling to overcome (perhaps a sinful stronghold, or marriage, family, or financial).

4. It could be spiritual (the enemy is just bombarding you with constant discouragement you’re too work out to fight back).

5. Or it may just be plain stress and exhaustion (the constant grind of pouring out your life and not seeing its immediate impact).

What do you do when you reach this point? How does a pastor or ministry leader press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called them heavenward in Christ Jesus when it would be so much simpler to just quit?

I’m going to answer that question from an account in Jesus’ life, but first let me share with you an experience I had recently that had me thinking about all this.

So a little while back, I was in the middle an extended prayer and fast. I had reached the halfway point and my body began to protest. If you’ve ever fasted, you know what I’m talking about. It’s that moment when suddenly you feel like your stomach has started a civil war in your body. You have headaches, you’re slow and you’re desperately hungry.

I must admit that on this particular day, I was seriously considering ending my fast early, not because I felt God had heard and answered my prayers and given me permission to stop, but simply because I was desperately hungry and craving a plate of Jollof rice and fried fish. For some reason, the hunger pangs and the headache on that day were stronger than usual.

By God’s grace, I did not give up my fast, for one specific reason. I kept reminding myself that the breakthrough that I was seeking God for through the fast, for my family, for our ministry, and for Nigeria was worth enduring whatever physical discomfort I was going through.

Just AT THAT MOMENT, the LORD began to frame in my mind why it is we mustn’t drop out of the race He’s called us to run in ministry even when the dark nights tempt us to.

The Holy Spirit brought to my mind that long night that Jesus endured in the Garden of Gethsemane right before He was arrested.

If you remember that event, it was late at night and Jesus was all alone because His closest friends, His disciples had fallen asleep and couldn’t stay awake with Him. Scriptures say Jesus was in great physical, emotional, and even spiritual anguish, so much so that He prayed three times, that if it were possible, the cup He was about to drink should pass from Him.

Three times!

In fact, Luke 22:44 says, “And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.”

So, think about that for a moment.In a moment of weakness, Jesus considered the possibility of sidestepping the cross. In His frail humanity, He was wondering if there was another option other than the horrible death He was about to.

To be clear, it wasn’t just the physical pain that Jesus was dreading, rather, it was the separation He was about to experience from the Father because of our sin. Remember, in a few hours, Jesus is going to be “pierced for our transgressions” and wounded for our healing, the SIN of the world would be dumped on Him in the same way that a tank of sewage would be poured on a person.

And there would come a moment when God the Father would have to turn His face away from the Son (which is why Jesus would cry out, “Eli Eli Lama Sabachthani” “My God, My God, why has thou forsaken me.”) Jesus dreaded that moment so much that in Matthew 26:38, He says, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.”

This was truly a level of emotional and spiritual stress and agony that no human in history has ever known. Your eternity and my eternity were weighing in the balance at that moment because if Jesus had given up His mission on earth at that moment, our salvation would have been in danger.

• If Jesus doesn’t go to the cross, there would be no salvation.

• If there is no Salvation, there would be no entrance to heaven.

• If there’s no entrance to heaven, only one place left for us to go – hell!

So listen, you and I will never have to bear the burden Jesus did on that night, however, you and I will almost certainly experience our own version of a low point in our life, our faith, or ministry. A moment where we find ourselves crying out to God and asking, “God, where are you in all of this pain?”

For the record, the Bible is filled with examples of people who experienced very low moments in their calling and ministry.

• Think of Abraham. He was promised that he would be the father of nations and it eventually happened, but it didn’t get fulfilled in his lifetime. Only God knows how many nights Abraham laid in his tent staring at the sky wonder when and how this would happen when he barely had a son.

• Joseph was shown in a dream at a young age that he would be a ruler over his brothers and his family, and it eventually happened, but not till age 30. Imagine all those long nights when he laid down in prison (or as a slave in Potiphar’s house) wondering whether God had forgotten him or if he even heard God correctly.

• Then of course, let’s not forget John the Baptist who was so Spirit-filled that He was one of the first people to see the world’s Savior and Israel’s redeemer. Yet, John was arrested, and while he waited in prison for His beheading, he struggled with doubt so much that he had to send one of his disciples to ask Jesus, “Hey, are you the Messiah, the one we are waiting for or did I mishear God??”

If I asked you to tell your story, I’m sure you have had some faith-shaking low moments in ministry that would rank up there with these guys.

Theologians have actually come up with a term for experiences like this, it’s called, “The Dark Night of the Soul.”

Different people have defined the dark night of the soul in different ways, but one meaning they almost all agree on is that it refers to a moment of personal emotional and spiritual crisis.

It actually lasts longer than one night and more accurately describes a season of life where you may be experiencing spiritual dryness or darkness because God seems so far away; and no matter what you do, you feel like you can’t connect with Him.

Having lived through it myself, here’s what I can say to you with Holy Spirit filled confidence – The Dark Night is not something to fear. If anything, it can be a prelude to a great spiritual breakthrough in your life.

We actually cover this topic in great detail in a 3-day seminar that we offer for pastors here in the city of Jos, Nigeria. It’s called, “SOUL CARE FOR PASTORS & MINISTRY LEADERS.”

Having taught this course to over 4000 pastors across a dozen different denominations, here’s what I can tell you:

the key to breaking through the dark night of the souls is to actually “LEAN INTO THE NIGHT”.

Specifically, lean into what you already know to be true about God. Jesus sets that example for us in His prayer in that same Garden of Gethsemane when, in spite of the emotional and spiritual agony He was facing, He prayed, “Not my will, but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42).

Jesus essentially just “leaned” into what He already knew to be true about God, despite how dark that night was. Jesus LEANED into the night knowing that God’s plan was good and perfect (even if it hurt) because He understood that at the end of the night, GLORY AWAITED HIM AND SALVATION AWAITED US.

The author of Hebrews 12:2 actually gives us some insight into what Jesus was thinking at that moment during His dark night of the soul when He leaned into the night and entrusted His life and plans to the Father.

Hebrews 12:2, “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

And there it is. Jesus saw past the pain, past the darkness, past the gruesome cross and He saw me. He saw you. He saw your family, and He saw your church AND our redemption. More importantly, Jesus was motivated by obedience to God because He saw that it was only through His sacrifice that we could ever be reconciled into a right relationship with God.

THAT IS THE JOY THAT WAS SET BEFORE HIM…. And for this reason, He endured the shame of the cross, scorned its shame, and paid the price for the penalty of our sin.

So, let me ask you pastor (or ministry leader), what is the joy set before you?

• Take a moment and dream beyond the discomfort and trial you’re facing now; what was the promise of Christ that first drew you into ministry? Can you still see it?

• What was the pure and holy ambition that made you give up every other calling to devote your life to serve God’s people and reach people far from God?

Let me wrap this up by sharing with you some very practical ways to replenish your soul as a ministry leader and pastor when you find yourself in this place:

RE-ORDER YOUR PRIORITIES. If you are facing ministry burnout, it is very possible that you have put ministry first, God second, family third, then personal and physical health last.

This, my friends, is a recipe for spiritual and emotional burnout!

Your relationship with God should always come first! (I’m not talking about attending church). Rather, I am referring to your personal quiet time with your Father in heaven.

What things did you do at first that stirred up a great love for Jesus Christ in your life? One of the ways you come through the dark night of the soul is by returning to your first love, Jesus Christ and doing with Him the things you did at first!

Here are a few ways to return to your first love…

• Read Bible stories, not to teach, just to know God more and to feed your soul.

• Go for a prayer walk; not a prayer meeting, just you and God… don’t talk the whole time, spend some time listening and responding.

• Spend social time with other Christians; not to plan ministry events, just to chat about what you are learning in the word (or how God answered your prayers).

• Read a good book or watch a good movie that helps you laugh or have a good cry. If it’s a Christian book, read about the early revivalist …”God’s Generals”.

• Take one week off from church and church-related activities; if you can find another pastor you trust to preach for you that weekend, great.

• Spend that week resting and talking with your wife. During that week, take your wife to eat at a restaurant you can afford and tell her what you appreciate about her.

• Play some music with your children and have a dance competition.

• Create a journal and write down how you’re growing in your faith.

• Make confession a daily habit (if there is something you’ve done that doesn’t honor God. Confess it in detail to God and ask Him to forgive you. Receive God’s forgiveness and get back to living).

• Spend one day a week fasting and asking God for strength and direction for you personally.

Brothers and sisters in ministry; you have one life to live, and it shall soon pass. Make it count!

May God bless you this week as you live for him!

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